Alabama Fan Arrested For Killing Auburn Oak Trees
UPDATE: Case cracked! Police have arrested Harvey Almorn Updyke, 62, from Dadeville, Ala., and charged him with criminal mischief for poisoning the Toomer's Corner oaks.
(Pro Tip: When you commit a crime, don't brag about it on the South's most popular radio show.)
There's also a live Toomer's Corner webcam for those looking to commiserate with the trees. Fans have toilet papered the oaks out of respect.
EARLIER: the insanity that is college football in the state of Alabama reached a new nadir this week, as an Alabama fan has admitted to using a powerful herbicide to kill cherished 130-year-old oak trees on the campus of arch rival Auburn.
University officials announced that soil tests had revealed that a "lethal dose" of tebuthiuron had been spread around the live oaks at Toomer's Corner, a popular spot on the Auburn campus where fans often gather to celebrate momentous events (like the Tigers' recent BCS Championship victory last month, above.)
The poisoning was discovered after a Crimson Tide fan called Paul Finebaum's popular sports talk radio show to brag about murdering the beloved oak trees, as revenge for the Tigers' Iron Bowl victory this season. he ended the call by saying, "Roll Damn Tide."
Experts said that the poison was registered at a minimum of 0.78 parts per million, which is a “very lethal dose” and as high as 51 parts per million. there is no danger to humans, but officials are worried it could spread through the soil to other plants and trees on campus. Tebuthiuron use is monitored by the FDA.